FCC Nitwits Get a Jolt of Reality

In a world filled with morons, the FCC deserves a special gold star for being supremely idiotic and out of touch. Anyone remember wardrobe malfunction? Anyone remember five second delay? If you do, feel free to blame the FCC for making a mountain out of a barely existent molehill.

In a stinging bitch-slap, an appeals court called the FCC’s fines and penalties against broadcasters for sending the f-word over the airwaves “arbitrary and capricious”. Amen, you old fart judges. You tell ‘em!!

I’m sure matters were helped along by the FCC declaring that the

“f-word inherently has a sexual connotation”

What are these guys smoking? Maybe we should put all the FCC censors in a little room and force-feed them George Carlin’s infamous ode to f-bombing.

In the aftermath of this rebuke, FCC commissioner termed the judgment “disappointing to him and millions of other parents”. You tell me – what kind of weak-kneed pussified parents are so afraid of a little profanity? What in the world are they so afraid of? That their kids will learn the meaning of the word “fuck” before fifth grade? Uhh, reality check. If a kid hasn’t the word “fuck” by fifth grade, it was probably raised in Amish country. Let’s not bullshit ourselves, folks.

Secondly, any real parent should be able to sweep inconvenient topics under the rug. Don’t want to talk about the f-bomb? Just buy the kid a shiny new toy! That’s Parenting 101, baby.

I should really write a book on parenting…there’s a killer idea.

On AskX and Ask3D

I’ve been playing around with AskX (the double-secret search sandbox, tongue in cheek) for the past two months and have been consistently impressed. It is nice to see them debut their product to the world at large under the name “Ask 3D”. John Battelle talks about the new interface here and discusses that only a fourth-place player like AskX can throw caution to the wind in terms of getting rid of crusty old SERP.

Unlike most other folks, I’ve been using AskX for quite awhile, and here are my deep-thoughts-by-Jack-Handy:

a) GOOG Universal search is somewhat behind the curve on the interface. While GOOG’s results are unparalleled, Ask’s UI risks have paid off handsomely.

b) I use AskX for health queries as part of my day job. AskX tries to provide a more 360 view by bundling Wikipedia, Healthline results and images/videos.

c) AskX did not have UI skin options – Ask 3D does. God bless Ask 3D! Trivial, cool stuff makes my day.

d) While the world is gaga over Ask’s repudiation of the traditional SERP model, I would argue that they didn’t go far enough. Unless I’m batshit blind, they still have a bunch of links in the middle rail of the results page with “extras” on the left/right rail. Call me biased, but I truly believe that Kosmix tries very, very hard to push the envelope on a keyword interface (even though we’re decidedly NOT search and don’t compete with Ask/GoogMonster). Try a topic – it’s on the house!

e) Ask Morph has made a big deal out of narrowed/expanded searches. However, their scope is IMHO not very expansive. For a health query example on which this feature falls over, see screenshot below. Kosmix will do a far superior job of categorizing the term “rooster comb injection” and mapping it to osteoarthritis.

Update: I love Valleywag, but watch them get too caught up in being snarky and go fabulously wrong on Ask’s prospects here

Introducing – The F.O.B. Chronicles

Most people have a hard time coming up with a set of ideas and terms that truly define their personalities. It is hard enough to figure oneself out; it is harder still, then, to articulate one’s sense of self in five, ten words. That’s exactly why Orkut’s profile pages stink.Personally, I attempt to describe myself as follows: “cynical, depraved, hedonistic, opportunistic and fresh off the boat” . While the last term sounds like a circumstance, not a personality trait, it is by all accounts a life-defining event. It is an event which frames people’s careers and their choice to be addressed as an “alien”. If you’ve spent any time with an Indian immigrant in Silicon Valley (where there is no dearth of us, by the way), you know what I’m talking about.

Therefore, I’m introducing a new set of posts on this blog known as “The F.O.B chronicles”. These posts will deal with one of the following issues:

• Life as an immigrant who grew up in different (tougher) circumstances than most of my peers.
• Going to college as a “boatie”. Think coming of age story meets the gas station story. Oh wait, are there any stories dedicated to gas stations? Hmm…
• Bollywood mockery. Who doesn’t a love a good, hilarious Youtube video? Sample this gem below, review coming soon.